Gratitude and being

The most wonderful morning. The most wonderful now. I woke up, and my head is clear. I am myself. I am all here, what it is I call me. It is so welcome, I am so glad, so grateful to be here again.  
How to explain it? The past ten days, my head, my self, [...]

Two beautiful days

The inspiration of my son arriving Friday night, and my sister arriving last night has been wonderful. Being with them is a breath of life and freshness. Yesterday I talked to Stephen about his life in
Melbourne, and it is all so perfectly suited to him, most especially all the philosophers he has met. Today, we [...]

The next stage of the journey

I have been letting the next stage wash through me over the past two days. My scan results showed a many brain metastases, swelling in my brain, my lungs, a lot of growth in the liver, bony growth on the base of the spine, which is what hurts. I am taking a steroid now to [...]

Down and up

Today was a strange combination. I woke up at 5.30. I peacefully meditated. I felt filled with light, and with knowing that all is well. Nothing needs to change. I can let go and accept that all is as it is. Accept that all is love. Myself and others and all that is. There is [...]

Two days to shake the world

I’d thought of this title before I heard there was an earthquake in the
Solomon Islands last night, and a tsunami warning. Must have been something in the air. Or the earth.  
Every moment is a challenge. Today is the day before my scan. Wednesday is the day to get results from the scan. The range [...]

Compassionate witness or inspector?

Being in the moment means observing awareness as well as being and doing. Wayne Dyer calls this taking the position of the compassionate witness to your life. This is part of awareness of love and perfection in the moment. I try to nurture it.  
This morning though I noticed that quite often my observer is [...]

On chanting and the best of all possible worlds

I chant the Lotus Sutra, nam-myoho-renge-kyo, which is part of many Buddhist traditions, but I have learned it through SGI Buddhism. To me, what it stands for is the divine perfection of everything. When I chant nam-myoho-renge-kyo, the primary focus I have is that everything is perfect as it is, and also perfect in how [...]

Contradictions

No final decisions yet on next week, for there is still this week to go through…I had blood tests today and at 5pm got a call to go up to the hospital because I had low potassium levels. I put it off until tomorrow because I would have been there all night.  
Before I had [...]

To face reality or to look away?

How much is it necessary, right now (or next week), to face up to exactly what is happening in my body? I would rather wait. I would rather nothing was changing too, but it is…but is it changing urgently enough that I need to find out now? Couldn’t I wait and see, seeing as it [...]

Letting go of little things

Today was about letting small changes flow naturally into my time, letting go of the resistance. It wasn’t easy, but it did evolve, with degrees of acceptance. It increased my awareness of how letting go of little things on a moment to moment basis makes a big difference to enjoying and being in the present. 
I [...]