I had a dream that helps me with my current situation (described on the About page, and in the two posts below).
I was in a vehicle, like a Moke, a low vehicle with open sides. My grandmother and my youngest child are sitting in the back. For some reason, I can’t, or I don’t want to, drive – I have something more important to do, and this is right. I know the other thing is the priority. So I am not sitting in the driver’s seat. In fact, no-one is. The vehicle is careering wildly across country.
It is open country (no road), African hills, of the cropped-down, used up variety. There are lots of muddy pools, mud that has been churned up, like a motocross track. There are many rocks, streams, occasional people: many obstacles, twists and turns. Every now and then I reach over and twist the steering wheel so that the vehicle doesn’t overturn or smash into something. I wish somebody else would do this, because I’m busy!
I find myself saying, ‘Could one of you just give this wheel a twirl now and then, so we don’t crash.’
Then I think, how ridiculous, neither of them can, a crazy old lady who hasn’t really noticed where we are, and a little child who never has before, how could you make him responsible? So I keep doing it, successfully, even though it’s a drag and a distraction from the main business, which obviously must be done too.
Suddenly we are in a valley. It is dusk, and the valley is bivouacked, full of police, multitudes of them.
At first, I think it is some kind of massive road block. Guiltily I think it’s surely enough hours since I had that gin and tonic, I don’t feel any effect from it, I should be okay, I guess I’ll find out in a minute when I’m breathalysed, how long it takes to get through my system.
Then I think, perhaps I really ought to be in the driver’s seat, that might be a requirement.
The vehicle has slowed right down, and I see the police are smiling, going about their business. They are at some huge camp, not concerned with traffic at all. I smile back at them, thinking I’ll probably get through this okay as long as I don’t knock anybody over. Then they wouldn’t be so friendly. So my focus now is on steering the vehicle through. In peace. It is not so difficult. I am not trying to do anything else.
I have to go and do a taxi run now for my daughter, so I’ll post my analysis of how the dream relates to the current situation tomorrow. Anyone else’s ideas welcome.