Dream driver

I had another short dream, related to the previous one I’ve written about. It continues on the ‘whose driving’ theme.

I am in a van, Kombi-sized, with a closed two-seater cabin. I am in the passenger seat. The van is moving, but there is no driver, as in the previous dream. This time I am not driving at all. I look at the empty seat, and notice we are moving along. And I think (without actually recalling the earlier dream), here we go again, no driver.

A voice says, into the cabin, ‘What do you mean, no driver? Of course there’s a driver. How do you think we got this far?’ The voice is strong and amused, rather than annoyed.

And it seems self-evident to me that what the voice says is true. Although I am puzzled that there appears to be no driver that I can see, I accept that, in fact, there is one, and everything is under control.

So what does this one mean? How does it relate to the last one, and my newly invigorated decision to be my own driver?

It seemed to me to be clearly about a higher, invisible force – about God, about an inner self, about Shiva, about the subconscious – about forces of the universe. And the feeling that it was all under control, even if I couldn’t see the way that it was.

This dream reflects a stronger state of faith than I’d say I’ve felt before. My agnostic mind finds itself surprised – although why it should be, I don’t know, considering the feelings and thoughts I’ve had for quite some time, and most particularly those on death and hope from yesterday. It is unusual to find myself reaching such a definite conclusion on such a topic.

Also, I don’t think the dream was implying that I couldn’t or shouldn’t drive. But maybe that I didn’t have to, no need for desperation, no matter what happens. This fits with how I was feeling yesterday, the sense of a calm hopefulness. And it hasn’t stopped me from doing a fair bit of driving my own car today. I’m having a scan on Wednesday to see whether the small fractures in the femur that were discovered today can be repaired with a steel pin. And more drugs etc are on their way. Today all went very smoothly, with sympathetic assistance from four doctors, coordinated by an inspirational one.

I am happy about the invisible driver.


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Filed under Cancer, Dreams, Spirituality

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